The instant James Courtney spotted the woman seated beside him on the flight, he knew it was going to be a rough one. She was enormous! With her seated next him, how in the world was he going to travel in comfort? The woman took a seat, jabbing at James with her elbow as she fastened her seat belt. “Observe it!” She turned to face James as he aggressively yelled at her. Oh, how I apologize,” she sobbed. “Pardon me, please.”
“Pardon me?” James mockingly asked. Or pardon the three thousand doughnuts you consumed to reach that weight? The woman gave him a startled gasp, and James noticed that she was rather young with a weak but sweet face. It made him snarl, “Lady, you need to book TWO seats when you travel!” The woman’s eyes welled up with tears, but James was in the mood, especially after noticing how cheap and dated her clothes were and how worn out her shoes were.
He remarked, “I take it your entire money is spent on hot dogs and nachos? So you are not able to afford two seats? “I am sure all your other travelers will be very giving when you pass the hat the next time.” The woman turned to face the window, and James saw the tears streaming down her cheeks in the reflection. He said, “Listen.” “I am sure my friend who owns a clinic down in Mexico will give you a liposuction for a lot less money!”
Before James felt fully compensated for the pain of being pressed up against the soft mass of the young woman, sobs were resounding from her shoulders. He thus requested a Martini when the bartender arrived with the drinks cart. In his best James Bond voice, he said, “Shaken, not stirred,” and then added, “I do not know what Moby Dick here will drink.” The attractive attendant gave him a snide look while pressing her lips together tightly. Next, she spoke to the woman seated beside her. “Madam, what would you like to drink?”
With a nod, the woman dabbed at her eyes. “A diet Coke, please.” James sneered. “Do not you think a diet Coke would be a little late in the game?” Though he was ignored by both the flight attendant and the woman, James experienced a slight pleasure upon realizing he had annoyed them both. While the woman next to him sipped her diet Coke, he reclined and bit on an olive and sipped his Martini. With a shudder, he realized she would eventually need to use the restroom and would be squeezing by him.
Shortly after he finished his last drink, the flight attendant arrived carrying food. She placed a lovely tray in front of him and another one in front of the passenger next him. “Are you certain that will suffice?” “Because it seems like it would take a village to feed this person,” James questioned the flight attendant.