I always hated my father because he was a motorcycle mechanic, not a doctor or lawyer like my friends’ parents. The embarrassment burned in my chest every time he roared up to my high school on that ancient Harley, leather vest covered in oil stains, gray beard wild in the wind.

I wouldn’t even call him “Dad” in front of my friends – he was “Frank” to me, a deliberate distance I created between us.

The last time I saw him alive, I refused to hug him. It was my college graduation, and my friends’ parents were there in suits and pearls. Frank showed up in his only pair of decent jeans and a button-up shirt that couldn’t hide the faded tattoos on his forearms. When he reached out to embrace me after the ceremony, I stepped back and offered a cold handshake instead.

The hurt in his eyes haunts me now.

Three weeks later, I got the call. A logging truck had crossed the center line on a rainy mountain pass. They said Frank died instantly when his bike went under the wheels. I remember hanging up the phone and feeling… nothing. Just a hollow emptiness where grief should be.

I flew back to our small town for the funeral. Expected it to be small, maybe a few drinking buddies from the roadhouse where he spent his Saturday nights. Instead, I found the church parking lot filled with motorcycles – hundreds of them, riders from across six states standing in somber lines, each wearing a small orange ribbon on their leather vests.

“Your dad’s color,” an older woman explained when she saw me staring. “Frank always wore that orange bandana. Said it was so God could spot him easier on the highway.”

I didn’t know that. There was so much I didn’t know.